Let’s face it, you’re not getting any younger, and you can only try to find “the one” on Tinder so many times. Dating is annoying, and you’re a student too; texting someone to be left on read, going to dinner to only find out that Jared D. hasn’t actually left his parent’s basement; who has time for that? We didn’t. So what’s a college student to do? How do we manage school, parents, money, and love on top of that? Well....that’s where Michigan Marriage Pact comes in.
Michigan Marriage Pact is a brief-survey open to current University of Michigan students that asks a whole bunch of questions ranging from poitical and religious views, to if you’re seriously considering a pre-nup. Then, after taking all of your answers, our scientifically-proven computer algorithm matches you with your most compatible partner. You don’t have to ask if your match hates country music too, you’ll already know; no more guessing!
So imagine Dave; Dave is our super scientific, super accurate algorithm, and he’s also a dog. He doesn’t have a 9-5, he doesn’t need to attend his mother-in-law’s birthday dinner next weekend. A teeny bit because he’s a dog, but mostly because his only job is making your life easier.
After you’ve submitted your survey, Dave will compare your answers to Jessica down the hall, or Kylie from your class; he’ll do the same for them too, but don’t worry, he does all of his work anonymously so nobody (NOT EVEN DAVE) knows who you really are. Then, he makes a giant map and starts playing match-maker; keeping into consideration what you’re looking for, and what others are looking for too. Dave is good at his job.
At the end, Dave returns his matches; you and everyone else have their best possible match across campus. You get their email and they get yours, and if sparks fly, then Dave has done his job.
Try “social experiment”. Look we get that marriage is in the name, but we never said it applied to your match. You two can be best friends for all we know, and if you’re best friends who are single in 20 years then who knows.
In a perfect world, we really want everyone to have their boo, but you and I both know it’s not a perfect world. Most of the time you’ll find your person, but some of you might be just a little too unique. Does this mean you’re unlovable? Probably not. Does this mean nobody on this campus really gets you? Honestly dunno maybe.
You’re putting words in our mouth. You don’t have to “love” anybody; you don’t even have to meet them. All we do is give your umich email to them and you theirs, from that point on it’s your job to make the magic happen if you want it. What if you don’t want it? Well then send them a quick “K Bye.” and be on your merry way.
Why do you assume we have some sort of ulterior motive. We just want to spread compatability is all. We’re not the first to run this survey, it’s totally a college-thing. So we thought we’d spice up Umich just a bit.